5 PILLARS FOR MEN TO HAVE BALANCE IN LIFE
Every man must control 5 Pillars representing all aspects of his life to some degree to create balance. Each Pillar is a representation of a man’s values and character which is his foundation. Without one Pillar erect and intact the others suffer. These methods are for men to realign with their own values to live a complete life.
1. Spiritual
The spiritual pillar is a path and purpose. It is that thing inside you that is calling out for more in life. You could have the money, power, woman, children, and material things of the world. When the spiritual pillar is cracked or unstable you may feel lost or misguided. There is a spiritual void that you must plug using the stable pillar. When this pillar is erect and strong, you gain the peace granted only to those that know why they are here, what they are here to do, and reasons they must do those things.
To fill the spiritual void is to find acceptance of our circumstances and focus on a bigger picture. This may come in the form of religion or worship of a higher power. It may also look like the mission statement of a new business or nonprofit. It could be enrolling in the military and adopting the patriotic ideals of your country. All of these institutions have the same thing in common: a clear mission with set standards, morals, beliefs, obligations, and values. Having these things given to you takes the guess work out of finding purpose in our lives. The best feelings you can have in life are meaning and belonging. You must do the hard part of finding where you belong.
2. Mental
The mental pillar is erect in your life when you are coping well with your past and present circumstances. There was a time when I was about 19 years old. Every day was filled with monotony. It was normal for my friends and I to escape using alcohol. I was not in a good mental state. I was aware that my emotions were not stable. I was not happy with my lifestyle at the time. I had the overwhelming feeling I was not in full control of my life. I just remember wanting to take my own life. There was a void in proper coping mechanisms and a lack of vision in my life.
The Mental pillar is used to fill the void of mental health and stability. The Emotional pillar is closely related and codependent with the Mental pillar. To erect the mental pillar correctly, you must become aware of any underlying issues plaguing your mind and come to terms with them. This may be seeking therapy by a licensed professional to work through past trauma. This may be accepting certain terms in life that my be slow to change or unchanging. You may lack vision, and this could stifle your growth requiring you to seek mentors for a better outlook on life. These are all examples of ways to change your mental state by changing how your mind views past and present experiences.
3. Physical
The physical pillar is physical well-being. There are many ways to approach taking good care of the body you spend so much time in. The two approaches that almost every other fall into are physical health and physical fitness. Obviously, these two are related but engage the body differently. Physical fitness is the body’s ability to perform physical activities. Physical health is when all internal and external body parts, organs, tissues and cells can function properly as they are supposed to function.
This pillar requires you to be aware that your health is in direct correlation to how you show up every day in life. Physical health and fitness require conscious effort on your part to support the body. This means being accountable for food or drink you put into your body. This also means engaging in exercise daily to keep proper body composition and mobility. There is no lack in ways to accomplish this task however, society pushes convenience, calorie dense foods, and cancer-causing additives. Be vigilant and protect your body because no one else will.
4. Emotional
The emotional pillar is emotional control, stability, and maturity. It is tied to the mental pillar in a way that if either is unstable the other is also. Emotions can be in turmoil because of your mind’s reaction to a current situation that may or may not be under your control. The mind could be suffering from poor coping habits from the past. For example, you may react negatively to recently hearing a loved one died suddenly which might prompt an uncontrollable or even hysterical episode of grief. This would be understandable in that moment. However, being suicidal because a short-term relationship ended with a significant other does not call for such a reaction. This is both an example of emotional immaturity as well as possible underlying mental trauma from the past.
The best way that you can erect the emotional pillar is to be hyper aware of your emotional state. Take regular self-assessments to watch any changes in your emotions. Take note of triggers create those changes such as people places and things you may need to avoid in the future. Come up with coping mechanisms to change your emotions to your desired state. You can go see a professional in connection with your personal circumstances to learn methods to gain control if you are having a hard time. It is a good idea to make a conscious effort to learn about yourself because no one knows you like you. For example, when I am feeling overwhelmed, I like to take a day off of work and take a walk in nature to unwind. I know that about myself. I know that works for me. Remember that it is ok to not be ok sometimes. Just don’t wallow. Go so something about it because the help is out there. So do the inside work necessary to have the emotional control to enjoy this life.
5. Financial
Last, but definitely not least, the financial pillar is very important in a man’s life. Taking control of your financial pillar is the responsibility of every man and can affect the emotional and mental pillars. Money is the leading issue causing divorce. Just as an example, divorce can be emotionally, mentally, and financially taxing for people. Unfortunately, financial literacy is not taught in public schools before high school, if at all. Without a basic foundation, many of you do not understand just how important seeking how you will achieve financial freedom really is.
You must prioritize your financial health the same way you prioritize your physical health. You require income to pay for living expenses for yourself but also your family is relying on you to support them. If you are married, you must work together to provide a safe home environment with food, clothing, and security. These things require money. Financial resources equal security. This has a direct effect on your self-esteem. To provide for yourself and or your family is a source of pride for a man. You can keep your financial pillar intact and erect keeping this in mind.
These Pillars of Man are the foundation of a man. If you can keep in mind to watch these aspects of yourself, you will be able to keep balance within your life.
- If you become lost, check your Spiritual Pillar to make sure you are well grounded in purpose and value. Ask yourself: Am I where I want to be? Where am I going? Why?
- If you feel a change in your mental state that you disagree with, check your Mental Pillar, and watch activities such as recent input and output that could be negatively affecting your thinking processes. Ask yourself: Are the current people, places, and things I am engaging with conducive to my peace?
- When you feel unwell or even uncomfortable in your body, check the Physical Pillar for habits that could boost health and fitness. Ask yourself: Do I have good eating habits? Do I prioritize physical activity? Am I attending all my health appointments?
- When you are not feeling quite well, maybe you are unsure why, check your Emotional Pillar. Feelings of anger, amotivation, sadness, anxiety, depression, or stress are indicators that you need a reassessment of your mindset and environment. Ask yourself: How do I feel right now? Why do I feel this way? What are activities or environments that I can engage in that can change my emotions?
- Some of your emotions are dictated by the stress from our lack of money. Check your Financial Pillar to assess if you are making good financial decisions. Ask yourself: Do I have good financial habits? Do my activities align with my long-term financial goals?
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